Hi, I'm a teenager with a social life.
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molebucks:

lovely-dna:

molebucks:

treat me like a college textbook. spend lots of money on me but never touch or look at me

no. treat me like your favorite book. keep me by your side, touch my every page, learn all my twists and turns, remember every word I say, even the ones that make you cry

*4-second-long fart noise*

almondmilkpapi asked: Hi there, once you get this you have to say 5 nice things about yourself publicly and then send this to 10 of your favourite followers

almondmilkpapi:

first of all i just want to say i’m honoured to be one of your favourite bloggers. huge fan

1. i can’t breathe underwater

2. didn’t learn how to read until i was 15

3. i’m a virgin by choice

4. i only have two teeth and they’re both molars

5. last time i checked i have 10 toes

lilkittygrl:

you-can-call-me-carl:

How come a girl can wear guys clothes and look cute or wear a suit and look hot, but when a guy wears a dress or a skirt it’s weird?

because our society thinks it’s degrading to be feminine



Track: Iris
Artist: Goo Goo Dolls

jumpingjaverts:

jumpingjaverts:

jumpingjaverts:

jumpingjaverts:

whats the difference between outlaws and inlaws

outlaws are wanted

come on reblog this my grandma told me this joke and was convinced she was going to be famous on tumblr for it

every time my mom and grandma get into an argument my grandma says “excuse me pamela i am famous on the tumbler”

gayturians:

lyraffect:

gayturians:

once when i was little, i claimed it was a teacher’s work day so i wouldn’t have to go to school and mom’s not an idiot so of course it didn’t work, but when we got to the school, we found it was a teacher’s work day and that made me think i had super powers so i started trying to kill classmates with my mind to confirm the theory

You thought you had super powers so you immediately attempted to murder everyone

go big or go home